WRITER'S BLOG

October 24, 2018

Machines.

Let me explain machines to you, my dears. They're all fascists. If you can't think like they do you're doomed to burn in hell. That's all you need to know.

September 27, 2018

Dance to the Music of Time.

Last night my partner and I went to hear a blues band called The Blueswater at a small local venue. The evening kicked off with the singer performing a Skip James number (before the rest of the band joined him) with just a guitar on his knees and a bottle neck. He did it really well. The band followed up with a load of my favourites – numbers made famous by Howlin’ Wolf, Muddy Waters and the like, numbers written by the God, Willy Dixon.

We’d been to this venue before, and at the bar prices are astronomical. We smuggled in our own beer.

The music and the smuggling reminded me strongly of my misspent youth. I became quite nostalgic, except for two factors. First, everyone was over 50; second, no one was dancing.

Years ago, at Crawdaddies, the Marquee or the Station, everyone would’ve danced their little socks off. What has happened to my generation?

Then the band played a number from Dr John’s ‘Gumbo’ and I remembered seeing Dr John live in the Racetrack in New Orleans. He had a dancer on stage with him and he kept an eye on her, and on the audience – he was actually playing for the dancers.

The next time I saw him play live was in Bristol. This time only a handful of us got up and boogied on down to the front and danced. But sure enough – we were who he was watching and playing for. When the set was over going back to my seat I caught some disapproving glances and a few remarks about showing off, and spoiling someone else’s view. Sad, I thought – can’t they see Dr John wants to be danced to?

So I thought last night, as we sat at our tables and applauded politely that in one respect at least we knew better how to behave when we were young. Early blues music, played properly, has a wonderfully heavy, seductive beat. It’s downright rude to sit still.

September 4, 2018

Trying to Think Clearly.

Anti-Semitism has been described as ‘The Longest Hatred.’ It has so often been used by those with power and influence to distract ordinary people's attention for other, real and pressing problems. You only have to think about Germany in the ’30s.

Is this what's happening now in the UK's Labour Party? Is the right wing press using accusations of anti-Semitism to tear the left apart? It looks like it.

But is there anti-Semitism in the Left leadership? Yes, it looks like it.

Is there anti-Semitism on the Right too? There always has been and I'd be very surprised if there weren't now. (more…)

August 4, 2018

Not Such Good Intentions.

If I were wise I’d be ballyhooing my new hot-off-the-presses sequel to Lady Bag: Crocodiles and Good Intentions. But it’s hot and I’m unaccountably irritated, and I’m no good at self-promotion, so I’ll go with the irritation instead.

Okay, here’s my beef: I’m not all that interested in clothes – I like them old, soft, loose and comfortable. But sometimes my nearest and dearest persuade me to go for something other than what I kid myself is charity shop chic. So sometimes I go out and spend money. And here’s the bugbear: (more…)

May 24, 2018

How Philip Roth Nearly Killed Me.

Well, I'm sorry Philip Roth has died. But thinking about him and his idiosyncratic take on the world he lived in reminded me of an incident from long, long ago in my must-spent youth when he was very nearly responsible for my early death.

It was summertime and I'd driven down to beautiful Lyme Regis. I was, I hoped at the time, a rebel, a risk-taker and experimental in my attitude to experience. In other words, I was an art student who'd read Jack Keroac, de Quincey and many others. And I'd probably understood very little. But on this day I had a little mescaline in one pocket, Keat's Endymion in another, and a copy of Portnoy's Complaint in my bag. (more…)

April 26, 2018

Normal Service?

There have been several excuses in the past couple of weeks to gnaw my fingernails down to the second knuckle.

First there was the Post Office telling me there is no connection between itself and Royal Mail: that false information put on a label by someone at the Post Office which resulted in a lost parcel had nothing to do with the PO because the information on the PO’s computer was from a Royal Mail site. Not our problem, mate.

Then there’s Bose who refuse to repair a very expensive piece of kit even if I pay them (more…)

April 23, 2018

Born Again Porn Again. Seriously.

Coming back to a horrible subject – I receive regular pornographic emails. I consign them to junk and block the domains of the senders, but they just keep coming.

Occasionally I check them out. Some purport to be sent by men, others by women. The stuff supposedly sent by men threatens me with exposure for wanking to porn sites. When it's apparently from women who 'know what men want' it is simple-minded and disgusting. Both approaches presume to be telling men what they want and what they're doing about it. That’s a presumption insulting to men and damaging to women.

Are men so stereotypical in enough numbers to make this kind of fishing worthwhile? (more…)

March 25, 2018

Lost Treasures

Last week my friend joined the likes of TE Lawrence and Ernest Hemingway when he lost two crucial chapters of the book he’s writing.

This concerns me because I was helping with rewrites and editing. In my clumsy way I take a hard copy and on it write in pencil all my corrections, suggestions and lyrical pensées. Pencil notes can be erased and ignored but if they’re lost they’re gone forever. No copy exists, no carbon, no electronic trace on a memory stick.

You’d think, in the electronic age, that this kind of incident was a thing of the past. (more…)

March 14, 2018

Hello My Victim

Today I had another email from Haggerty James which began, ‘Hello my victim’ and ended ‘Think twice.’

Apparently I have been filmed masturbating to porn. My blackmailer will send the video to everyone on my hacked contact list tomorrow unless I pay $290 US using bitcoins. There are detailed instructions about how to mine bitcoins.

As scams go, I think this might be quite a good one. I like the idea of pornography being made using the customers of pornography as its subjects. And I like the idea that there might be a few people around ashamed enough to pay up.

Porn isn’t a victimless crime.

March 5, 2018

Recent Movies

All the movies I’ve seen in the past few months have been women led: Hidden Numbers, The Florida Project, Molly’s Game, Three Billboards in Ebbing Missouri, Lady Bird, and I, Tonya. These are not all art house movies. They may not be big budget La-La-Land fare, but they’re American and Hollywood-ish. There’s a lot to applaud. And a lot more to hope for. Although I have to say I felt that I, Tonya was a true American tragedy, played for laughs.

I’m so impressed with two older actors: Frances McDormand and Laurie Metcalf – absolutely riveting, bad hair and all.

Selected Works

Don't judge a book by its cover, or a bag lady by her appearance. "I didn't always look like this," she says. "Being barmy doesn't mean I'm stupid." Lady Bag does have her problems - her close relationship with cheap red wine, for example. When she gets hammered she talks to her dog. When she's extra-hammered her dog talks to her. Guess who makes better sense. She and her greyhound, Electra, wander through the streets of London, seeing a Dickensian side of the capital city that's only visible to the homeless. Together they accept the kindness or unkindness of strangers with the same wry patience. Until, on one dreadful day, they meet the Devil outside the National Portrait Gallery.
All Birdie Walker wants is some justice for her husband, Jack. But since Jack was a rock star and the justice has to come from the music business, Birdie absolutely has to take some extreme measures.Click on the title for more information.
Short stories
All my short stories up to 2003 are in this collection. It includes two written specially. Click on the title for a bit about how I came to write short stories and more information.
The Anna Lee series
I wrote six novels about Anna Lee. Click on the titles for more information.
The Bucket Nut Trilogy
Professional wrestler Eva Wylie appeared in three novels in the '90s. Click on the titles for more information.
Other stand-alone novels
RIFT is set in the Ethiopia of the 1970s. BALLAD is the story of a girl with a miraculous musical talent. MISS TERRY is the story of what happens to someone who looks different from her neighbours when a grisly discovery is made. Click on the titles for more information.
The story collections I co-edited for Britain's Crime Writers' Association.
In the early '90s I helped edit these three books - aiming them to be more annuals than anthologies. They include many things we're proud to have published. Click on the titles for more information.